You know those people who you can consider “habitual daters”? You know, the ones who have boyfriends or girlfriends all the time. They break up with “Guy A” only to jump on Tinder or Hinge one week later and find “Guy B” in no time.

Yeah, I know those people, too. And I used to judge them.

When someone hopped from significant other to significant other, I couldn’t help but think, “How can they even truly like each person they date, much less love?” Take my cousin, for example. I love her to death but she’s literally had a different boyfriend every year for the past four years.

For a while, I wasn’t sure if I was worried for her or…jealous. I mean for two of those four years I was single. During those two years I suffered from feeling used and mistreated by people. I couldn’t understand why the guys I liked didn’t like me back and why the guys I didn’t like wouldn’t leave me the fuck alone after I told them I wasn’t interested. Meanwhile, my cousin was experiencing the wild, beautiful roller coaster of love with a new guy every 10 months.

That’s when I realized: Wow. I’m a jerk.

The Self-Jerk Realization

Okay so now that we’ve covered our society’s tendency to judge people who have S.O.’s all the time, now let’s uncover how we truly feel about ourselves.

Yeah, that’s right. I said focus on yo self!

Judging other people for the way they decide to live their lives is inflicting terrible energy on yourself. If you feel yourself caring a little too much about what so-and-so is doing, and who is dating who (except if you’re watching the Bachelor, of course!), then you’re inviting negative energy into your soul.

Okay, even if you don’t believe in the whole “energy” and “soul” concepts, you should still get what I’m trying to say. Being envious or judgmental over other people’s dating style is only going to make you feel worse. Focus on yourself. Figure out what your heart needs. Stay in your lane. Write about it. Go out and do something about how you’re feeling. After all, gossiping and rolling your eyes and dwelling on someone else’s life isn’t going to do anything for you except make you more irritable.

It’s easier for us to do ourselves wrong. It’s easier for us to give into the thoughts that ultimately don’t enhance our souls and wellbeing because negative thoughts usually provide us with instant gratification.

I challenge you to find your will power.

Find it within yourself to push your energy into more postive thoughts and actions that help you develop into the person you want to be. Rather than conjuring up the energy it takes to talk and think badly about someone else’s choices, I challenge you to put that energy into a new hobby. I challenge you to put that energy into going for a walk in nature. Basically, I challenge you to use that energy in a way that maximizes your potential.

Good luck.

Let me know what you think. You know I want to hear your thoughts.

SheSalt